macadamia nuts.

filled with so much pristine energy.

i can be very exposed one minute &

the most oppressive the next.

but i still need to be handled gently.

there's something inside so brilliant & wild

that wants to get out; but it takes time.

& time is not on our side.

im a macadamia nutshell.

the hardest nut to crack.

It sounds bad but I really want to get out and I just cant!

"Something is holding you back" is what I've been told for years.

I just haven't figured out exactly what that is, and why.

I'm trying to be strong because I want this!

I've never wanted anything so bad in my life.

They say what you want ain't always good for you,

But I just can't let this one slip...